Not literally of course.
Anyway my issue today is with that warm, heartfelt Weight Watchers commercial I saw last night.
Now before you get your bingo wings all a-flapping, please understand I have no issue with fat people. With the exception, of course, of fat people that are so angry and upset about how fat they are, that they take that angst out on every person they meet and are just generally a motherfucker to deal with.
Those fuckers piss me off.
Anyway in this commercial she says something I very much disagree with. She states that inside every single fat woman is a thinner person trying to get out.
Now I’m sure in some cases this is true, but we all know that in some cases as well, inside that fat woman is 2 or 3 smaller women that she has captured and eaten. You’ll never hear that little truism on a commercial I don’t think.
Also as a footnote, if you are offended right now, then you are one of those aforementioned angsty people that needs to lighten up, and love yourself for all the good things about you. Your body is just a shell.
And stop being a dick to people.
Yes Oprah I’m talking to you too.