Our Retarded Society And Why It Pisses Me Off (And Maybe What To Do About It)

I think I have finally articulated what it is that pisses me off so much about the world around me.

It’s a bunch of things actually, and I will list and define them here, but this moment of clarity by no means came easy.
Our culture here in North America, if one could even use that word to describe it, has allowed itself to become fat, lazy, gleefully stupid, ignorant of actual facts and blindly faithful to even more ignorant religions and faiths. But the biggest issue is our constant subdivision into petulant little groups of people that genuinely, but for no valid reason, vehemently dislike each other.
So listed here are a few things wrong with our present day society. Except I will also include some radically unheard of solutions, just so.you don’t get the impression I’m just some cantankerous prick.
1. We are a society of fat-assed gym slaves.
That’s right. I used that word. Fat. And you know why? Because it’s a perfectly valid descriptive word. I don’t used it as a derogatory term. And i don’t use it to demean. It’s a description. And I’m tired of the whiny segments of our population taking away perfectly valid words cause it hurts their precious little feelings. It’s nonsense.
Either way our bipolar culture these days only seems to have two settings. Obese, or gym slave. Personally I’m neither. I go to the gym, but am no means one of these irritating ass hats that seem to think existence would come to an explosive and tragic end if they couldn’t spend hours punishing themselves to attain some impossible ideal. At the other end of the spectrum I could probably stand to lose 10 or 15 pounds, but am no means at the level of rampant obesity I see around me every day. I’m always amazed when I walk through a mall food court and see a really large, whale-sized human, so large he or she has to remain mobile by employing one of those rascal scooters, sitting at a table with 4 Big Mac containers in front of them. Cause and effect illustrated perfectly.
Can we not go back to the heady old days where there was a healthy middle ground? Do we need to be a nation of extremes? Well I may have the answer. It may seem a bit out there but I’m sure even the most dumbshit among us can wrap our heads around it.
Eat right and exercise at least twice a week.
Sane right? The Obese give up the diet of fast food and utter shit and hit a climber or treadmill once or twice a week. And you gym Nazis can get yourself a sedative and spend a bit more time with family and friends and maybe have a donut on occasion.
2. The dumbasses among us have begun to dictate education.
We have all seen this happen, especially if you have kids.
I’m not sure what my kids do at school all day, but such a volume of homework comes home with them, in grade two, that I’m pretty sure they’re left to their own devices for pretty much the whole day. I seem to be personally responsible for teaching them to read, write, do math and think for themselves. Pretty much everything I’m currently being over-taxed to pay for overpaid teachers to do.
To say nothing of the fact that, no matter how delayed a child is, it’s impossible to hold them back to year. We are doing children no favors by both under-educating them and teaching them it’s impossible to fail.
I could rant about the educational.system all day, but I have way to much to still type.
Either way there is a clear solution for this crisis. Put the Japanese in charge of our education system. We have proven we are too retarded to do it ourselves, and theirs produces the smartest, most articulate and capable students in the entire world. If anyone could fix a system as systemically broken as ours it is them.
3. We have become a lazy welfare state.
I know you saying right now that it’s easy to blame problems on the poor, and I would like to state categorically that is NOT what I’m doing.
Social assistance is a great tool to help those who need it through difficult times. I applaud it’s existance.
However my issue is with the abusers. The lazy shit heels that enjoy the public largesse of this system, without ever giving anything back and without ever trying to improve their situation.
I’m happy that this system is in place to help those who genuinely need it. But every fucking one of you has an example in your head right now of some lazy prick that has no intention of ever getting off of social assistance because it is just too damn easy to sit back, play video games and wait for all that free money to roll in.
Our current system has made it far too easy to take advantage of a system that has become afraid to hold anyone accountable for anything at all.
However I think there may be a way to at least partially fix the problem. It’s not a perfect solution, and probably has flaws that I have not forseen, but could it really be all that worse then the bloated system of waste we have right now?
I say we put a term limit on assistance. Instead of getting it forever we give it to you for a specified period so that you can get your personal.shit together, and then move on. I don’t think that’s unreasonable.
Also I think it’s completely reasonable to expect that while on social assistance, that people can be useful to the community. In record numbers social programs such as shelters, soup kitchens, sports programs and youth outreach complain of a dearth of volunteers. How is this possible with this giant resource of people with lots of time in their hands?
I think, as taxpayers, we need to start expecting more for our hard earned money then to see it simply given away, with little to no.prospect of any return.
4. Special interests wield all the power.
We live in an age where the special interest group has more influence in our daily lives then our jobs, friends or even the government. They dictate how we are permitted to speak, what we are allowed to find funny and what segments of our population are more important then the rest of us.
Women, midgets (sorry, little people), albinos, indians (both kinds), Asians, black people, Martians, anyone who isn’t white, children, the handicapped, disabled, cognitively impaired, cross-eyed, lesbian, gays, transgendered, shemales, gay transgendered shemales, people with speech impediments, people with extraordinary amounts of body hair, or with unibrows, assless chaps enthusiasts, smokers, non-smokers, nerds and even crackwhores. They all have an advocate group somewhere.
Basically as long as you’re not a white dude, there is a special interest lobby out there that will fight for your right to party in almost any situation. And will be happy to represent you in the eventual civil lawsuit that will occur if anyone happens to impinge upon your rights, or bruise your easily hurt feelings.
When did we break off into these petulant, angry little tribes?
And when did we as a species forget how to just get the fuck over ourselves?
Unfortunately I have no cure for this, aside from putting every special interest advocate on a big cruise ship, and then sinking that motherfucker in shark infested waters.

I will be periodically updating this post with other points, I’m just too damn tired to go in at the moment.
Please feel free to comment if you have points of your own. I never delete or block thoughtful and reasonable comments.
However if you can’t spell, type in acronyms or ebonics I’ll publicly mock and humiliate you just for being a fucktard.

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